Saturday 29 December 2012

Afraid In My Own Country

Incredible India! used the phrase "dilwaalon ki dilli" to promote tourism in Delhi. Let me tell you why the phrase is totally false and a lie. Do I need to recount the horror of the Delhi gang rape here? No, you must have read it somewhere else. It is interesting to see how one incident changes the thoughts and feelings of a woman towards her own country, her own society, her own people and the opposite sex.
    The earliest memories of newspaper reports on rape are from class 6-7. I did not really understand how it affected women. Now when I recount the incidents I cannot help but wish to be anything but a Homo sapiens. I do not wish to be a part of a species which is so damned and immoral. You expect to be safe on a crowded road, don't you? An assault on dignity . Two women were sexually assaulted at the Gateway of India by around 70-80 men. Others watched in silence. They were having their daily quota of porn and probably saving some bandwidth. Flip through the incidents and you will realize rape is not a spontaneous crime but the culprits have planned it in their head for quite some time. 
   
   Coming to how the recent Delhi incident changed my thoughts into something I had never imagined in myself. Now I am wary of every male stranger. I am afraid even of the traffic commotion. I feel myself dwindling. My views and fears might seem paranoid but they are true for a lot of women. You know what happens when a woman is raped? She loses herself. Her family might disown her. This  society blames her for stepping out of her home. She is blamed for having a dream, for giving wings to her dreams. Her dreams and wings are set on fire. She is basically blamed for being biologically different than males. You find the last sentence offensive? If yes, well, leave this post right now because you cannot tolerate the harsher truth coming your way. People talk a about a woman's body in an utterly derogatory manner and how many of you tried to stop them? In a train/bus the conductor and passengers deliberately touch a woman's body inappropriately. How many of you tried to stop them? 

     How does someone's rape effect other women? She is scared. She is losing her faith. She is losing her calm. She is becoming angry. She is becoming weaker. Her family is putting more restrictions on her. The society is blaming women for being whores. Coming back from a tuition makes you whore? Having a boyfriend makes you a whore? Chasing your dreams makes you a slut? Does a desire to progress, a desire for knowledge,a desire to succeed means that you are ASKING for rape? The society seems to think so. The anger against the Delhi gang rape will soon fizzle out like carbon dioxide from a shaken up bottle of coke because the politicians know that people cannot go on and on for months in this cold.

    I am no longer just angry as I was when I wrote this post: Why girls need to be superwomen?. I am disappointed, sad and scared for myself. I am not happy for having these feelings of disappointment and fear because they were never a part of my identity as a female. As a person I did fear certain things and overcame them. Nobody is perfect. As a woman, did I fear the society? No. I had faith in it. I thought the society would stand up to evil. But it did not. I kept my faith but all of a sudden the faith came down like a card tower. It had weakened over time.

    I don't like my country's capital anymore. Yes, it might be the epitome of opportunities for Indians and an example of India's accomplishments, but for me its a representation of a lot of things I hate. One of them, insecurity. Insecure in my own land, among people who were once my own. They are no longer my own. I can't be one of them. I don't want to be one of them. I am not telling you that everyone there is bad. There are some wonderful people there, but they no longer define Delhi. The people are no longer the ones with hearts.

   Would I disown this country? I might. This is not the country portrayed in its national anthem and national song. This is not the country I am ready to die for. This is not the country worthy of the Indian Army, whose men are ready to lay down their lives for it. I might go to another country to fulfill my dreams of knowledge. This is not because the other countries are safe or are totally unbiased against women. But I will have one consolation, that they are not my people. I was not brought up there. This grand old country has lost its charm for honesty and respect for women.

    Please don't plead for the innocence of most Indians. Innocent is the wrong word for Indians. This is not the country our freedom fighters died fighting for. They had a dream. We have failed them. But I will bring the dream back. And you, yes, you should pledge to change this country to fulfill the dream.

    Bon voyage!

Thursday 25 October 2012

The Greatest Indian Hypocrisy...

Born and brought up in cities where Durga Puja is one of the most important festivals ( mainly because of the Bengali community), there is a special place in my heart for the festival. Let me briefly introduce you to this festival. Like every other festival, Durga Puja is related to a mythological event. A demon Mahishasura was creating a lot of trouble and Goddess Durga was invoked to kill him which she successfully did. Her victory is celebrated during the ten days of festivities.

     In India, Goddess Durga is considered to be the Goddess of Power. This fact disappoints me. The very people who treat women like scum worship a goddess fervently. She is considered to be the epitome of knowledge, beauty and strength. But why this hypocrisy? It does no good to worship her and abuse her creed. How can a society host so much of dimwit and evil its people?

    Why does the society tell me to dress myself in such a way that I don't look too beautiful or attractive when hundreds and thousands of verses have been written in the praise of Durga's breathtaking beauty, the magnificence of her eyes, the power and calm in her smile, the illuminating glow of cheeks and the beauty of her hair?

    Why does the society tell me that females are not fit enough to manage equations, formulas and scientific laws when whole chapters have been written praising Her knowledge of the universe, the past, present and future? Why does the society believe that my knowledge of science and arts is taking my manners away when Gods and humans admired and praised Her superior knowledge of the laws of the universe?

    The society tells me to be soft spoken, to accept any atrocities that have been committed on me or which might be committed on me, to remain dormant to the evil plaguing the society, to remain silent when some people are plundering my country, to remain a mere spectator when my people are being killed and tortured?    But this society accepts the verses describing how She took various forms to purge the society of its evils. It praises the bravery, valor and grace with which She fights.

    Every time I see Her magnificent idols I just hope that I could love everyone the way she did. I wish that  the society learns to accept that every female has the capability to become at least a fraction of the perfect female that She is. I hope that women realize the incredible power they carry to fight any atrocities and make this world a better place. Meanwhile, I strive to gain as much knowledge as I can. I continue to say things the society believes I shouldn't. In my little ways I continue to fight the demons of the society while I fight the devil inside me that asks me to rest and forget the atrocities. I cannot sleep peacefully when the world is in peril.

   Some people are right in quoting:
" I am not worried that the world will end in 2012 but what will happen if it continues without changing".

May the force be with you in making this world a better place.

Saturday 14 July 2012

Why girls need to be superwomen?

Nobody is born a hero. People who choose to protect their people become one. When we talk of human rights we mean rights that a person is entitled to by the virtue of birth. Then why are these rights applied to half of humans? Yes we are half the human population and a lesser standard rbc count does not make us inferior.
   
      We live in a society where it is okay for a man to rape but shameful for a woman to get raped. And I am not just talking about hypocritical India. Believe me, women all over the world are subjected to inequalities and insecurities. There are laws against gender discrimination but I don't believe they have ever been implemented.
     
       The latest incident in Guwahati is not the first of its kind. It was New Year 2008 eve when a girl was molested publicly at the India Gate in front of approximately 1000 spectators. Yes "spectators", as if some movie is going on. Obviously the men present there thought "Fine, this is my daily quota of porn". You find this vulgar or insulting to India? Let me tell you according to statistics released by Google India was among top ten locations from where search queries for porn were requested. Yet India takes pride in Goddess Durga and Indians still plead for their culture of modesty.

       Men, I don't expect that most of you will ever have enough guts to protect a woman. For most of you Sunny Leone is far more important than a girl studying hard. Teach men not to rape instead of teaching women not to get raped. But women it is high time that we shed all our expectations from men. Trust me, God (if you believe in one) never intended men to be your saviors. Forget that , the atoms that build you are of the same electronic configuration so there is no reason that you can't protect yourself. The time for another revolution is gone.... its war now: a war for survival. I know that its not easy. I have found myself paralyzed when confronted by eve teasers. Yes, I have been touched without my consent, unexpectedly by strangers but I have been brave enough to kick them and mouth a few bad words. Even black belts report a strange fear that prevents them from attacking back.

       What's the reason for rape and other sexual crimes on women? Short skirts or tight tops? No. The reason is upbringing of men. They are taught to treat women as their own property, perhaps as objects of desire. Girls, you have the right to choose what you wear. You don't have to be ashamed if you have ever been a victim of sexual crime. You dont have to worry if the police does not respond to your complaints. Be calm, think of a nice plot for murder, read crime novels, learns strategies, murder them and tell the police that you just punished your culprit because the police did not take action. That should be enough for a trailer.

     You don't have to change the road you take to your office or college. You have also paid the taxes so that you could afford infrastructure. If you find the roads troublesome because of miscreants and anti social elements, kill them. I am not even offering you to hand them to police. Seriously, kill them. You murder one and nobody would ever dare to touch you. Its your body and nobody can touch you without your consent. You are more capable of taking decisions for your country as those douche-bags sitting in the parliament. If you can give birth to kids and run a house, you can run this country. If you can teach manners to your kids you can teach some to criminals as well.

     I no longer consider murder to be a serious crime considering the way women have been treated over two milleniums. A serious and thick plot to disable a woman's ability to protect herself and to speak for herself. Why weren't we sent to gurukuls like boys? Its time to spoil the plot. If its all about supremacy I shall have it and I won't put men to the same disadvantage that women were put to, because I am not just an ordinary girl. I am a superwoman and I don't believe in inequality. Hail the war for justice.